i sort of assume that anyone who knows me also realizes that i am a hot mess, and that the pretty pictures or magical moments that i post are also balanced out with the reality of the less documented life: loneliness, temper tantrums, a messy house, failed expectations, parenting dilemmas, marital discord, disagreements with friends, family drama, not-so-photogenic dinners, sucky days in which everything that can go wrong does, feeling like a less than stellar friend, daughter, sister, wife, mom....and the list goes on.
but maybe i've been assuming that the life any of us portray through social media is understood to be just a portion of one's experience. that all of us have moments of feel left out, or sad, or a disaster, or less successful than others. and that those pictures in our feeds, or the status updates are a snippet- often of the highlights.
last night i was so tired that even though our house looked like kansas after a tornado i went straight to bed.
i have no idea what i am doing in my studio right now, and whether everything i am painting is terrible or just about to be great. really hard to not compare myself to other artist friends successes.
i spent my studio time last week working on new card concepts and ended up with not much of anything good, despite a deadline yesterday. that is super stressful since my entire income is based on royalties.
i am trying to work with monrovia on reading and subtraction and they are such a struggle for her, so homework time is less than awesome.
i know working out is good for me and makes me happy when i am done, but i just can't figure out how to fit it in to a daily practice unless i wake up earlier but i am so tired in the morning.
i am really frustrated with the state of my waistline but see earlier comment on working out.
my six year old is keeping me on my toes and by that i mean throwing daily tantrums and then needing a ton of attention and love.
matt and i are going out of town next week and we haven't even had an evening to sit down and plan any of it.
don't get me wrong, there is so much goodness in my life. i am incredibly thankful. i have an amazing network of people around me, wonderful children to snuggle, a home i treasure, a city i love, family and friends that make my world, and on and on....i am not complaining. just saying that i think all of us have glorious, beautiful, photo worthy moments. and all of us have terrible-horrible-no-good-very-bad stuff too.
here's to more goodness! and listening to each other so we know each other's best moments and each other's less than perfect ones too.